SATIRE: EPL: Nigeria's Silver Lining.
Jose with his negativity, Sarri with his cigarettes, Guardiola with his overthinking, Kloop with his "Robin Hood" act. Ladies and Gentlemen, I will like to tell you that it's that time of the year when nobody will really care whether it was Saraki that arranged DSS or it was DSS that wanted to arrange Saraki.
The Nigeria's political transfer might have clashed with football's own but its season hasn't commenced. In the last couple of weeks, we have witnessed both predicted and unpredicted transfers. From Ronaldo's unexpected move to Juventus to Saraki and Co's expected move to PDP. It hasn't been a boring one, except if you are a political United fan.
As enjoyable as it was, there is hardly anyone that will antagonize the point that one of the transfer session is a perpetual banal ocuurence. Every transfer session in Nigeria's politics has always been the same process. Most political half-conscious people saw the Saraki and Co's signing coming more than a year ago unlike the football transfer.
More than half of Chelsea's supporters would have banked against Kepa Arrizabalaga being a name of a goal keeper, it sounds preety much like a mountain in East Africa, eh?
Well, I don't have to tell Nigerian politicians that Nigeria has most of the ardent football fans in the world. President Buhari might decide to stage the OPC in NASS at the next plenary and make us believe it's Kwankwaso's doing, he will be more than fooling himself. Osinbajo could decide to pick up a broom and sweep the whole of Gwagwalada so as to make us believe he is the most active vice president ever, he will definitely end up as the most used meme this season.
Saraki can keep kidding, Buhari can keep up the "Buharism," Osinbajo can keep 'jobbing', EPL will keep 'lising'.
Peter Oyebanji is a student journalist at Obafemi Awolowo University and can be reached through Gmail: firstname.lastname@example.org Twitter: @anderpeter2